Making a dignified exit is such a valuable life lesson and is very important for us writers. It’s much better to end on a high and bow out gracefully while the going is good than keep flogging that dead horse. I was recently dismayed on reading the latest book from one of my top five authors: it was hackneyed, samey and the plot was practically identical to her last three novels; reviews showed other readers felt the same. Surely it’s better to quit while one is ahead before your writing becomes as unappetising as that stale leftover biscuit nobody wants. Keeping writing fresh and original is a vital part of the writer’s job.
This reminds me of the brilliant and peerless Fawlty Towers. Each of those 12 episodes is a masterpiece and the series is still revered, cited and loved today. Contrast that to ITV’s Benidorm series which, in my opinion, started off fantastically but dragged on years after it stopped being funny. We should all aim to create a Basil Fawlty rather than a Mateo the barman.
So it is time to resign from my newspaper column. It has been three and a half years since my first was published and my last is now on the newsstands; I’m their longest serving columnist . I’ve loved writing my column and hope my readers have enjoyed it too but I simply feel I’ve said all I can and it is time to move on to other projects. I’ve discussed subjects as diverse as men in flip-flops and Lycra, adopting a rescue dog, ghosts, tattoos, commuting, homesickness and the high cost of being a wedding guest. But now I’m leaving without fanfare and just slipping away.
Whether it is a party, relationship or job, there’s an art to knowing when to move on with your head held high. The worst exit I ever made was on leaving a job after being headhunted. Resignation tendered to my shocked colleagues, I swept towards the door – and my new, bright future – with all eyes on me, only to realise that as I had handed in my pass, I couldn’t actually get out of the door. The humiliation of having to turn round and ask for someone to let me out still burns to this day!
So watch this space for my new projects. I’ve been asked to be a guest stylist on an interiors magazine, I’m ghostwriting for a dog website and I WILL stop procrastinating and finally finish that book!